Dark Side Strip Club
by Free Again
Summary: Marie and Caprice are the owners of Dark Side. And yes it is a strip club, but the interesting thing about it is how the many guys got sucked over to the dark side and into Dark Side. Co-written by Free Again and Mrz.DracoMalfoy.
1. Prologue

Dark Side Strip Club

By: Free Again and

Prologue

The beat was throbbing through the air as the main 'event' attracted more and more women. Every Sunday night the Malfoy twins earned more money single- or rather double- handedly, than the other's did all week. There was just some sort of magic that pulled people off the streets, onto the strip. There was equal business at the bar, where the owners Caprice and Marie worked hard to keep everyone happy and 'hydrated'. Marie went down to where a co-ed group was flagging her down.

"What can I get you guys?" She asked the guy who was closest to her. He just stared at her drunkenly. Or so she thought, until he answered her in the most undrunken voice ever.

"I need an application." Marie's eyes widened in shock. This was the first person to ask for a job since the club opened.

"One second, let me help these lovely ladies first." She got their drinks ready, and then headed down to where Caprice was flirting with a very attractive specimen of the male species. One nod towards the back room, and Caprice excused herself form the conversation then headed to the back.

"Yeah, what happened?"

"A guy asked for a job." Caprice just started to laugh; no one willingly joined their strip club, unless they were completely turned over to the dark side. Which was the only reason they had opened it. To turn all of the hot guys into their 'slaves'. Not like sex slaves, but slaves of the Dark Side. Meaning evil. And it was very enjoyable to plot the corruption of the good and bad guys. So the fact that someone had asked for a job either meant he was crazy or wanted to be turned to the 'dark' side.

"Oh my gosh, you're serious?" Caprice asked, looking at Marie like she was crazy.

"Uh huh. I went over and he asked for an application. So should we give him one?"

"It all depends on his looks. Does he have what it takes?" Caprice had an almost evil smile on her face. Marie knew that look; it meant that they were going to corrupt another person. And this person had asked for it, but he didn't know what he was in for.


	2. How It All Started

Dark Side Strip Club

Free Again and

Chapter 1: How it All Started

After the graduation walk Caprice and Marie went to the park; where a party was being held in their honor. After many years of hard work in high school they had tied for valedictorian, and got to make a speech together. Now all they had to do was make it through a party were people would want to talk and congratulate them. And also give them money and presents. After getting through all of the cooing adults, they loaded every present into the car and drove over to her house. Marie's house was empty, since her parents had to get on a plane after the party to go to London on business; so the two were going to stay at Caprice's parent's house for a week before getting on a plane and starting their cross-Europe trip. And after they got back it would be off to college for them.

"Oh, my gosh, Caprice, can you believe we are done with high school forever?"

"Oh of course; we got through four years of high school. And what do we have to look forward to? Another four years- at least- of college." Marie just rolled her eyes at her overly sarcastic friend.

"Well, that is after our amazing Europe trip. Just imagine all of the guys who are going to be there." Both girls sighed at the thought of the many foreign guys they would meet on their trip. From Ireland to Greece. It would be amazing.

"Now all we have to do is get through all of these presents. Wanna help me get them out?" Marie was lounging against the side of their joint Mustang, while Caprice worked on getting the boxes out of the car.

"If you can't even carry a couple boxes, what was the point of super duper advanced weight training?" It was true that Caprice had taken four years of weight training, but Marie was just totally lazy.

"Gosh, Mandrews, you think you could handle this on your own," Marie goaded. Caprice glared at her. During Freshmen year, a guy friend of Caprice's had taken up to calling her Mandrews. Caprice had gotten extremely ticked off and was horrified to learn that the name stuck. For over a year, all of her guy friends would call her Mandrews, so, understandably, the mentioning of the nickname set her off a little. "Sorry, sorry," Marie said, a little exasperated at Caprice's overreaction.

"Well Marie, if you want any of your presents you have to carry at least two boxes in." And there were 6 boxes, so Caprice would carry 4 of them. The next task after getting everything in the house, was to separate the gift by who was the recipient. It took about twenty minutes to get through the pile, and by the end it was obvious who got more cash (Caprice) and who got more actual items (Marie). After opening a couple of presents they both grabbed a present from 'Anonymous'.

"Now that was creepy, what are the odds that we would have grabbed the same present from the same person. But we don't know who that person is. What if it's like a crazy stalker dude," Marie fretted, even looking over her shoulder, theatrically.

"Paranoid much. It's probably just a gift and they didn't want us to know who sent it." Caprice laughed at her friend, because it was so easy to scare her. "Let's open them at the same time. Three…Two…One." The shiny silver paper was torn away, and the girls saw that there was a note attached to the top of each.

"Dear Marie. Hey, that's me! But that doesn't rule out crazy stalker. Any who, back to reading. Inside this box you will find a locket. It looks just like an ordinary locket but its power only comes out when near its sister locket. I sincerely hope you use this new found power for good rather than evil."

"Mine says the same thing. Does this person actually think we would believe in magical lockets, although they are pretty." Both lockets were silver, and had intricate patterns accented with blue sapphires. They had tiny keyholes, but neither box had come with a key, so there was no way of opening the lockets and seeing what was inside. Despite the strange message, both girls felt compelled to put the lockets around their necks. After the strange blip in their presents, Caprice and Marie went back to opening presents; promptly forgetting about the two lockets.

The taxi pulled up to the sidewalk, and its passengers jumped out and grabbed their belongings. Each had two suitcases, a carry-on, and a purse. Caprice and Marie; because really who else could we be talking about; raced inside to scan the list of incoming and departing flights. Once they found their flight they saw that they only had about thirty minutes to get through security. They got into the shortest line, but didn't realize that it was the first class line.

"Hi we are running a little late, so can we go as fast as possible." Caprice smiled.

"Okay, what are your names?"

"Caprice Andrews and Marie Conover." The lady behind the counter typed in their names.

"Okay, it says you are in business class, so do you want to upgrade to first class?"

"Not really." Caprice was taking care of the check-in, while Marie stared off into space, her thoughts a random blob of realizations.

"Then you can go get into the line over there, and check-in to regular class." Caprice looked over to the line that she was gesturing towards, and her eyes widened. It was huge, there was no way they would be able to get through that one in the time they had.

"Fine we will upgrade. Just do it fast."

"I am going to need your IDs." Both girls handed over their drivers licenses. After checking that they were indeed who they said they were she typed more information in. "How many bags do you have each?"

"We both have two."

"Okay, that will be an extra $60 for bags. Would you like me to add that to the bill?" Caprice felt like she needed to hit something. Marie saw this and stepped in, handing the woman cash.

"Can we put our bags on the scale now?" Marie smiled, but you could tell she was annoyed. And without waiting for the woman to answer she had put the bags up on the scale, proving that they didn't weigh over 50 pounds.

"Here are your boarding passes, and I hope you enjoy your flight." But Marie had grabbed them out of her hands, and was far away with Caprice by the time she got to the end of her sentence.

"Caprice, calm down. We barely have enough time to get onto the plane without getting detained for terrorist threats." After taking a couple calming breaths Caprice smiled.

"Well, if we don't have time to waste; why are we standing here?" They walked at a brisk pace to security, and then straight to the gate. By the time they got to the gate they only had a couple minutes to board the plane, but they had forgotten about being forced to upgrade to first class. So when they got on and saw their seats the only thing they could think to say was-

"WOW." They sat down in the comfy black seats and sighed. The hassle was worth it if they got to go all the way to London in these seats. After the flight attendants went through the emergency procedures and the plane took off, they started talking.

"Okay, so the check in person ticked me off. But I now it's worth it to have these seats; the flight is super long. And I am glad there are only two in a row, so we don't have to be like squished by a fat guy." Marie stuck her head out in the aisle and looked back.

"I can't see any fat people, but they are probably in the window seats. Or squishied into the middle one. Can you believe we are finally on our way to London? I mean we have been planning this trip since like, three years ago."

"I know, it's kinda surreal that we are finally on our way. Even though we still have hours until we get into London." They both turned their attention to the in-flight movie, and spent the next couple of hours trying not to sing out loud to Moulin Rouge. And swooning over Ewan McGregor. After the movie they fell asleep; Marie reclining the seat, and Caprice on her shoulder.

Marie woke up to two things simultaneously. The first broke through her consciousness immediately, the flight attendant shaking her shoulder. "Um, excuse me miss. We are about to land."

"Okay, I got it. Now stop _touching_ me." The flight attendant hurried down the aisle, to go make sure everyone was awake for their arrival in London. Then the second thing began to work its way into her brain. "Oh my gosh, Caprice. Get off me. Why didn't you tell me you drooled? Now I have to go change my shirt, there is a gigantic drool stain on my shoulder."

Caprice had jumped back when Marie yelled, and in the process ended up hitting her head on the window behind her. Which only added to the confusion of waking up. She was fully awake by the time Marie got back, wearing a new shirt.

"What happened?" She said once Marie sat down.

"The eighth deadly sin." Caprices eyes widened. She hadn't drooled on anyone since she was a baby, and you can't help it when you don't know what is acceptable in the world. And drooling is most definitely **not** acceptable.

"Sorry, but it is a good thing we brought our carry-on's. Or you would have walked out into London with a drool spot. Now I have to fix my make-up, because I probably look like the crack fox right now."

"Kinda, you are just missing the peach hat." Caprice glared at Marie for a few seconds, then took out her traveling make-up kit and started to touch up her make-up. She finished just as they landed, and they got off the plane and got in line to be admitted into the country. After two hours of moving up slowly, they finally got through into the rest of the airport.

"You know what, I am starving." Caprice rolled her eyes at her friend, who never went more that two or three hours without eating something. And it hade been about five hours since the in-flight meal. And Marie had eaten two whole meals.

"Well first we have to exchange our money."

"Why don't we just us credit cards? I'm sure they exchange it for us." So after eating and getting lost they finally located the baggage claim, and the outdoors. It took another ten minutes to get a taxi and start on the way to their hotel. By the time they got to the hotel it was ten o'clock, but they were still wide awake. Which made sense because their bodies were still a couple hours behind in the United States.

"So do you want to ask where some good restaurants are, or just wander until we find something?" Marie asked once they got onto the elevator. Caprice thought about it for a moment.

"Well we came to discover what we want to do with life, so we should trust our instincts to guide us somewhere."

"Our instincts or our stomachs?" Marie asked laughing. They stepped out of the elevator and walked out the door. "I wish we had asked directions."

"What happened to letting our bodies guide us?" Caprice asked.

"Oh, I would be to busy listening to the accent to hear where they were telling me to go," Marie stated, then looked sideways at her friend, "Wouldn't you agree?"

"Duh, that's kind of the whole purpose of coming here. To meet tons of foreign guys, and swoon over their accents. Left or right?" They had reached the end of the sidewalk, and had to pick a path.

"Umm, I have no idea. Ask your instincts?" Marie looked over at her friend to see if she would just turn somewhere or make a big deal about asking her instincts.

"Oh all mighty instincts, which way should we go? We want food and fun, and hot guys would make it even better." Caprice spun in a circle, and stopped facing right. "I guess they say to go right."

"We have no better options, let's go." Marie linked arms with Caprice and started down their chosen path. The building to the side of them were stores and stuff that had closed for the night. Finally they reached some restaurants, but they were all gourmet, and Caprice's instincts, and their wallets, said nope. Marie was looking over to the other side of the street to see if there were any good places over there, when Caprice suddenly stopped and caused her to trip and fall. "What was that for?"

"I have found the place." Caprice said in a monotone voice. Marie looked up at the sign. The Leaky Cauldron.

"Wow, I wonder how much they had to pay to use the name? But this place looks like the place from the book, so maybe we will find some hot wizards inside." Marie pulled Caprice over to the door, just as it started to rain. Immediately someone opened the door for them and pulled them inside the warm room.

"That was really sudden, and now I am drenched." Caprice looked down at her outfit, which was in fact completely soaked.

"Just use a drying spell." The man who had pulled them in out of the rain said, looking at her like she was mental.

"Umm, sorry but I left my wand at home. Won't be casting any spells tonight." Caprice said, "Where can we get some food?"

"You can either sit at the bar or a table, and look at the menu." They nodded their thanks and started to walk away. After they walked a few feet, they noticed little things in the room that were a bit off. There were owls coming in and out of the windows. A man was sitting at a table stirring his drink, without touching it. And most of the people were wearing robes, like from Harry Potter. They looked at each other with wide eyes before quickly heading for a back table.

Marie leaned in to whisper to Caprice, "Did you see that guy? He was moving the spoon without even touching it."

"I know this place is weird. But I feel like we were supposed to find it. I mean I lead us right to it didn't I?" Caprice made her point then picked up a menu. "What are you going to get?"

"I was thinking about just getting a salad, what about you?" Marie looked up at Caprice, waiting for an answer when she was distracted by someone walking in the door. He looked exactly like Draco Malfoy

"Earth to Caprice," Marie said, waving her hand in front of the other girl's face.

"Oh, my God, Marie," Caprice began in a fervent whisper. "Do you see that guy?" she asked, discreetly pointing in his direction. "He's probably the hottest guy I've ever seen, and…"

"He looks just like…" Marie cut her off, amazed by the resemblance between this guy and the fictional character.

"Draco Malfoy," Caprice said, a little too loud. The boy's head snapped up in an automatic response, looking for something. Marie and Caprice looked down immediately, pretending to be engrossed in some kind of conversation. Risking a glance in his direction, Marie sighed in relief as she noticed him go about his business.

"I swear, he looks _just _like Draco," she dropped her voice to a low whisper, so Caprice had to strain to hear.

"He's just as hot as I knew he would be," Caprice sighed, a dreamy look fogging her eyes.

"It's not actually Draco Malfoy," Marie said, bringing her back to Earth.

"But, but, but," Caprice whined. "He's…he's just, wow."

"Well, hopefully he doesn't have the Malfoy attitude to go with the face," Marie stated, and Caprice looked at her in horror.

"Blasphemy!" she nearly yelled.

"Shhh…" Marie hissed, as half the restaurant had turned to stare at the two of them.

"How dare you!" Caprice continued overdramatically, in a much lower voice. Marie rolled her eyes.

"Here we go, again," Marie mumbled under her breath, bracing herself for the onslaught of fan girl that was sure to come.

"That's what makes him so attractive. The attitude is so…hot!" Caprice took a breath, getting ready to continue down with the conversation.

"Yes, yes," Marie cut her off hastily. "We all know you like the bad boys." Marie smiled a little, hoping, desperately, that she had shut Caprice up.

"We have to talk to him," Caprice insisted. "Obviously, he can't be Draco, but he's gorgeous anyway. Please, please, please?" she begged.

"You don't have to beg! He's hot, _of course_ we're going to talk to him!" Marie looked excited. "Do I look okay?" she asked, anxiously. Caprice looked her over carefully, as they always did when they were about to approach a hot guy.

"You're good," she declared. "Me?" Marie studied her closely.

"Yeah, you're fine," Marie assured her.

"You sure?" Caprice asked anxiously. "No stray boogers, or…drool?" she shuddered on the last word.

"Well, now that you mention it," Marie teased. "Just kidding," she added, when Caprice immediately reached for the mirror in her purse. "Oh, no," she sighed in exasperation before Caprice could respond. "He's leaving." Sure enough, the boy had gotten up from his seat at the bar and was now heading for the door.

"Can we follow him?" Caprice asked.

"You are such a stalker," Marie said, rolling her eyes. But of course she nodded anyway, and grabbed her things. "I'm still hungry," she grumbled quietly.

"I'll get you something to eat later, or we'll come back here, but the closest to Draco any of us is ever going to get just walked out that door. Let's go." As silently as possible, they left the restaurant. Looking both ways, they followed him left, staying far enough behind so they weren't totally obvious. After a few minutes they were both starting to get nervous, they were now following him down a dark alley. Then suddenly there was another person in the alley, so fast it was like he had apparated. The person looked just like the faux Draco they were following.

"Are they…twins?" Caprice asked in wonder.

"Duh, don't be stupid. They're either twins or clones," Marie hissed quietly. Caprice opened her mouth to retort. "Shh…" Marie cut her off, the twins were starting to speak, still unaware of their presence.

"Come on, Damien, you need to come home now, before dad sees that you're gone," the newcomer whispered urgently.

"I don't want to!" Damien said sharply. "I'm sick of living in the basement! No one even knows I exist. When I go out, everyone thinks it's _you_. I need to live my own life, Draco," his voice was accusing. Marie and Caprice both shifted awkwardly, feeling like they were intruding, but it didn't escape their ears that the name Draco had been applied to the boy that had apparated.

"Listen," Draco said harshly, "We go through this _every _time. Don't get mad at _me_. I sneak you out every single time. It might help if you actually acted like a Malfoy."

"I can't do that, I can't treat everyone like filth just to earn _Daddy's _approval. You're right though, I shouldn't be taking this out on you." The boy called Damien hung his head in defeat and grabbed Draco's arm. With a faint pop they were both out of sight.

"Did they say _Malfoy_?" Marie asked in awe.

"Is that even possible?" Caprice said, her voice returning to its normal tone.

"If, hypothetically," Marie began, "The world of _Harry Potter_ actually exists, does that mean that so does every other book?"

"I don't know, but we were just in the _Leaky Cauldron_ for God's sake. They were using _magic_."

"So Draco has a twin?" Marie mused.

"Do they actually keep him in the basement?" Caprice asked in horror. "Let's go back to the Leaky Cauldron and eat something and just talk about this, okay? I'm kinda weirded out, I'm not gonna lie." Marie nodded, still thinking, and they walked in complete silence back to the small restaurant.

"Alright, we're here, now what?" Marie asked, breaking the silence as they sat back down at a table.

"Okay, we need to have a come to Jesus, or whatever it's called," Caprice said. "Let's answer a few questions. Is this real?"

"Well we're both not having the same dream," Marie pointed out.

"How do I know that my dream isn't telling me that?" Caprice asked, hysterically. "This could be some elaborate dream or one of those prank shows. Oh, my God, what if it is?" Marie smacked her. "What the hell was that for?" Caprice asked in frustration.

"Get it together. I'm pretty sure this isn't a dream or a prank show, alright?" Marie said, trying to calm her down. "So, yes, let's say this is real."

"That means that the world of Harry Potter actually does exist?" Caprice clarified.

"Yes. Why are you so freaked out? This is _awesome_!" Marie told her.

"Well, yeah," Caprice conceded.

"I think we should cut the Europe trip short," Marie suggested, a mischievous look on her face.

"What?" Caprice asked in confusion. "We've been planning this for _years_," she argued.

"Think about it," Marie pleaded. "If this world exists, what else might?" Marie thought for a second. "What if Twilight is actually real, too."

"Oh," Caprice said, she hadn't really thought that over. "I guess we're going to Washington to find out!"

"We should come back here sometime, though," Marie added.

"Well, duh! Draco's here, you can't keep me away, I'm a crazy fan-girl," Caprice teased, now back to her usual self.

"Let's go."

**A/N The very first real chapter. I (FreeAgain) really hope you liked it. Me (Asia) and Savannah () have decided to have a contest. You see the main characters of this story Marie and Caprice are based off of us, and we wanted to see if you guys could figure out who is who. The first five people to review and get it correct will get a story of their choice written by one of us. And the pictures of the lockets are going to be located on my profile, please go look- they are really pretty.**


	3. Beginning of the Journey

Dark Side Strip Club

Free Again and

Chapter 2: Beginning of the Journey

Caprice and Marie spent the night tossing and turning; their brains in overdrive trying to comprehend what they had seen in the alley. By the time the sun came up, neither had gotten much sleep. So they got up with the sun and ordered room service.

"Hey M, I was thinking. Why don't we continue on our Europe trip, not go straight over to Forks. I mean, we might run into stuff over here too. And we might never get this chance again." Marie thought it over for a few seconds.

"Yeah, like we could go find a Quiddich team. Like the Irish, and that is our next stop." Marie said excitedly.

"And we are going to get to snog the rock. I am so excited about that." Caprice had been talking about going to the Blarney Stone for about three months. There was a knock on the door. "The food's here."

Marie went to the door and the bellboy came in with a trolley of food. "Caprice, what did you order?"

"The umm, breakfast sampler buffet." Caprice answered, after looking it up in the menu. "Why?"

"You ordered a buffet, for two people. Are you trying to make me fat?" Marie said, and then remembered the bellboy was still in the room. "Hey, you want some food? You can eat up here with us."

"Umm, I'm not sure it is part of my job to eat food with the guests." He said in his British accent.

"So." Marie said waiting for him to give another reson. "We'll tip you to eat this food. Because there is no way either of us can eat all of that." Marie said, and smiled.

"Yeah, you can say it would have made us upset if you refused." Caprice piped in. The bellboy looked defeated and sat down to eat with them.

-+-

"I think I am going to be sick." Marie said, as the boat started climbing over another swell. "I totally should not have eaten all of that food this morning."

"Well, we should have thought about that before we order all of the food." Caprice said, glad she didn't get sea sick easily. They were on a boat, crossing the Irish Sea on their way to Ireland. "I wish this would be over, I am totally soaked."

"Oh, I know. We should have stayed inside the whole time, not watched the storm." Marie said, while laying down on the seat, trying to steady herself; and her stomach. They had been outside for the first 30 minutes of the boat ride, and then suddenly a storm had appeared. And the boat dipped into a wave- causing everyone on board to be instantly soaked. So then everyone went inside to stay warm. And the combo of sea water, crowded people, and the motion of the boat was giving Marie seasickness.

"Ugg, how much longer? We have been on this boat forever." Caprice leaned her head against the wall of the boat and tried to fall asleep. Half an hour later on of the crew members came in and said they were about to reach the dock. Caprice got up and pushed Marie off of the bench to wake her up. "We're here dummy. Get up"

"Time to go kiss the Blarney Stone. Well, first we have to find our tour person." Marie said as she stood up and grabbed her suitcase. After getting off of the boat, they found their hotel and checked in their bags before finding the tour agency that they had booked a trip to the Blarney Stone with. It would take them an entire day to reach the stone, and they were going to have to spend the night in an actual Irish house. Since it was only going to be a night they had checked all of their stuff into the hotel, just bringing and overnight bag with them. After 6 hours on a tour bus, they reached the little village they were going to spend the night in.

"Okay, so each group has been assigned a house to stay at. There is a pub in town that you are more than welcome to go to, but make sure you are ready to leave at 9:30 tomorrow morning." The tour guide said as the passengers started to get up and leave. She handed each of them a card with the address of the family they were staying with as they passed. Marie and Caprice got off and immediately went out to find the house they were staying at, with the sole purpose of getting dressed to go to the pub on their mind.

"So, rules for this outing." Caprice started saying.

"And every pub or bar we go to on this trip." Marie interjected.

"Yes, all of them. Unless we say something differently when we go. So, we can't leave each other. Umm, no going home with any of the guys." Caprice said.

"Definitely. And, if you can't walk in a straight line, stop drinking." Marie added.

"Yeah, and now we need to get dressed." Caprice said, and they both smiled.

"So how are we dressing today? No shorts and tank tops, because that's boring. We could do, like, casual dresses," Marie suggested, but didn't look sure.

"I've got an idea," Marie said, after a few more moments of thinking. "We should dress in those clothes we brough that we would never have worn back in the states. You know the really slutty, low cut things."

"Oh, my God!" Caprice exclaimed. "That'll be so much fun!" Both girls began rifling through they're suitcases, looking for the outfits. Marie found hers first. The top was dark green, and the scoop neck plunged, the hem exposing about an inch of skin at the bottom. There were two ties in the back, one was a halter tie at the neck and the other a thin string in the middle of her back, exposing the rest of her skin. "I love that!"

"Thanks," Marie replied, "Now keep looking for yours," she commanded firmly. After another two minutes of frantic shuffling Caprice finally pulled out the bright pink shirt. The halter neckline was very low, exposing a lot of skin that Caprice wasn't comfortable with. After the neckline closed, it reopened again, showing a thin sliver of Caprice's stomach, the part in the fabric got wider as it reached the bottom. Both girls put on light wash jeans.

"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea," Caprice said, nervously fiddling with her neckline, willing more fabric to appear, but without avail.

"Come on!" Marie urged impatiently, and they both set off, walking towards the pub. "Wait a second," Marie said, stopping in her tracks. "There are two pubs!" she exclaimed. Looking in the same direction, Caprice realized she was right, there were, in fact, two different pubs. That was odd, the tour guide had only mentioned one. From the outside you could tell one was significantly busier, the outside was crammed with people from the boat. The other one appeared to be much calmer.

"Let's go to that one," Caprice said, pointing towards the less busy one. Marie nodded, but then voiced a valid point.

"Why is it that no one's going to this one?" she asked as they approached the door of the pub. Caprice just shrugged and yanked open the door. They both stopped short as soon as they were inside the frame. On one wall was a line of brooms, not like the kind you sweep with, the kind you fly with. Occupying the many stools were a lot of good looking men. The odd thing was they were all dressed in robes. Robes that looked suspiciously like Quidditch Robes.

"We-we did it again! Holy shit, Marie! It's like the Leaky Cauldron, only with a lot more alcohol! They're from Harry freaking Potter!" Caprice said under her breath, so as not to be overheard.

"Awesome!" Marie hissed. Only now did they realize they had attracted a lot of stares. Looking around they realized how sorely they stood out. Not only were they two of the very few females in the bar, but they were dressed like Muggles. Very trashy Muggles, as a matter of fact.

"I need alcohol, and lots of it," Caprice groaned. "Why am I wearing this?" she complained, going up to the bar.

"Hello," the barman greeted them. "Can I get you something?"

"You guys have firewhisky, right? Caprice asked. The barman looked at her like she was stupid.

"Butterbeer," Marie said, more confidentally.

"How much do you ladies want?" The barman asked, like he was talking to someone especially slow.

"The whole bottle," Caprice snapped. The man quirked an eyebrow and a man sitting beside her laughed. "What?" Caprice demanded, whirling towards the offending sound. He was a rather attractive guy dressed in red robes, the breast of his robes said 'Bulgaria'.

"There's no way in hell you can drink that much," he told her.

"I'm sorry, what's your name?" Marie asked before Caprice could respond. She was holding a mug of butterbeer in her hand now.

"Viktor Krum," he said, looking surprised that they hadn't recognized him.

"So you're saying that I, Caprice Andrews, can not drink this entire bottle?" she challenged, grabbing the bottle from the surprised barman.

"Absolutely not, but I'll tell you what. If you can, I'll buy both of your drinks," he said, gesturing to both Caprice and Marie.

"Cap, remember the rules, no getting insanely drunk!" Marie reminded her.

"Screw the rules, I don't wanna pay for this!" Caprice said, then took a large swig out of the bottle. "So what happens if I lose?" Caprice asked.

"I dunno, you have to pay for your own drinks, I suppose. And you have to hit on some Muggle outside," Viktor smiled. "Proceed with the drinking," he encouraged. The next thirty minutes passed rather uneventfully, except for the fact that Caprice was steadily getting drunker. She was about half way through the bottle when Viktor's smile started to falter. Caprice started giggling uncontrollably for no reason.

"Do you ever beat your Bludger?" she asked shrilly, and burst into new rounds of laughter.

"I'm the Seeker," Krum explained, he hadn't picked up on her innuendo.

"Oh, sweet, innocent Viktor," she said in a sing song voice, patting him on the head. She knocked back another gulp of firewhisky. She looked down at herself, and in her drunken state couldn't control what came out of her mouth.

"Do my boobs look big in this?" she asked, giggling.

"Caprice!" Marie said from beside her. "You are so drunk! Get a hold of yourself, put the bottle down." Marie reached for the bottle grasped firmly in Caprice's grasp.

"BACK OFF MY WHISKY, BITCH!" Caprice cackled, sliding her bar stool out of Marie's reach, knocking into Viktor in the proccess. "Sorry, Vicky!"

"You're funny when you're drunk," Viktor laughed. Remembering the dare, she swallowed another mouthful.

"Do you want to try this stuff, Marie?" Caprice asked. Marie shifted a little.

"Er...well, fine, I guess," she conceded, looking apprehensive. Caprice turned her glazed eyes to the barman.

"Get Marie a shot of firewhisky, pretty please with sugar, and sprinkles, and a cherry, and...and...Draco on top! I'd like that," Caprice mused, now talking to herself. The barman gave the shot to Marie. Marie took a deep breath and dumped the contents into her mouth. Immediately, they spewed back out. Caprice ducked, and Viktor was now doused in a mixture of saliva and firewhisky.

"THAT STUFF IS FILTHY!" Marie yelled. She grabbed her butterbeer and began drinking it quickly, desperate to get rid of the taste. As she did this, the door at the front walked in, and a man of about 24 came in, saw Marie, and immediately ran at her, his fists rasied. The man appeared to be drunk.

"I told you not to drink!" he bellowed, knocking the nearly empty mug of butterbeer out of her hands. Instantly half a dozen Quidditch players in either red or green had tackled him, Viktor among them.

"Jerk!" Caprice screamed at him.

"What the hell were you doing?" An Irish player demanded.

"Chill guys," Marie said. "He's right, I shouldn't be drinking anyway. It's not strong, though," she justified. The man stood up, brushed himself off with a shred of dignity, and walked out of the pub.

"Oh," Caprice crooned, drunkenly. "You were all so marvelous," she said to the Quidditch players that had tackled the attacker. "You guys have big arms, very pretty big arms," she said. "Can I feel your arms?" she asked the nearest guy. He nodded warily, and she latched onto it. She used her other hand to continue drinking the alcohol. "I have a bet!" she yelled at him. "Viktor doesn't think I can drink the whole bottle, but I'll show him," she said, sinking back onto her stool unsteadily. She pulled the Irish player onto a seat next to her. "You have very pretty eyes," she observed. Caprice drank some more, she had about 1/4 of the bottle left now.

"Do you wanna go back to my place?" he asked abruptly, and Caprice's eyes widened a little.

"Could we get a puppy on the way?" she asked excitedly.

"Don't take advantage of her because she's drunk!" Marie exclaimed. "Caprice, he just wants to sleep with you, he's not going to get you a puppy!"

"And why is that so bad?" Caprice asked, her voice climbing. "Let's go!" she said, grabbing the man's arm.

"You don't even know his name!" Marie said firmly. Caprice craned her neck to look at his back.

"His last name is Anderson and he plays for the Ireland Quidditch team! He's famous, Marie!"

"We have rules," Marie tried to reason. "No going home with strange guys!"

"I WANT TO SHAG FAMOUS GUYS!" Caprice yelled. "I'M GOING TO SHAG LOTS OF FAMOUS PEOPLE!" Marie smacked her across the face, hard.

"You're only saying that because you're drunk! Tell _Mr. Anderson_ to leave." The man shrugged and walked away. Caprice took a large gulp, clearing half of the remaining contents.

"LA LA LALALA LA LA LALA LA LA! I'M A SMURF!" she started singing. Marie rolled her eyes and Viktor guffawed.

"She's not normally like this," Marie assured him. "I blame you. She can't turn down a challenge!" Caprice had now changed songs and was singing _Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy_, but was instead singing, loudly and off key, _Save a broom, ride a quidditch player! _

"I AM THE DARK LORD WALMART!" she screamed, standing on top of her stool and draining the last of the bottle. "It's like Voldemort, all evil, all the time, but now it has lower prices! Yay, bow to me. For I am Walmart!" She clambered off her stool. She looked around the pub, until she saw Anderson again. "ANDERSON!" his head snapped up. She motioned him over, and he walked towards her, uncertainly.

"Can I help-" he began to ask, but couldn't finish the question, as Caprice was now kissing him. Marie rolled her eyes, but chose not to interveen. The quick kiss was turning into a full blown make out session. When they broke off, Caprice took a breath, then fell straight backwards, passed out. He managed to grab her before she hit the ground. Marie grabbed her, pulled her back to a seat, and plopped her down roughly.

"Anderson," one of his teammates called. "Maybe you should quit Quidditch for tonsil hockey," they jeered.

"Dang it!" Marie glowered at the unconcious girl. "She's the one that knew the address of the place we're staying. We're screwed!"

"You guys can come spend the night at my house if you need," Viktor offered.

"Oh, thank you so much!" Marie said gratefully.

"Even though I am a strange man?" Viktor said as he picked Caprice up bridal style.

"Well, we aren't going home with you for _that _reason." Marie said laughing. "We just need somewhere to stay for the night before we continue on the tour."

"What reason would you be refering to, may I ask?" He said, and walked towards the back of the shop. He tapped some bricks and an opening formed, much like in the Leaky Cauldron to Diagon Alley. The group went through and it closed behing them.

"Well...umm. You know. Like. You know." Marie looked up at him, begging him to not make her actually say it.

"No, I don't know. That's why I am asking you." Viktor was enjoying messing with the seemingly calm and collected woman walking next to him.

"Wearen'tgoingtoyourhousetohavesexwithyou." Marie said in a rush. "We are just going to spend the night at a friends house."

"So I am a friend?" He asked surprised that they thought of him that way. Most girls would have gone home with him in the hopes of sleeping with him, because of his Quidditch fame. But these girls seemed indifferent to his fame, and that made him curious as to why.

"Well, only if you want to be our friend. I mean, if you don't want to we won't force ourselves on you." Marie said quickly, hoping she hadn't offended him by referring to him as a friend.

"Oh, no I was just surprised that you would call me a friend. Most people just hang around me, they don't bother with even pretending to be my friends." Victor said thoughtfully, and then realized they had passed his street without him even noticing. Instead of making it obvious that he hadn't been paying attention to where they were; he decided to walk in a large circle to get to his house. Eventually they made it to his house, and he put Caprice in one of the extra rooms. Then he went out to the kitchen where Marie was searching through the cabinets for something.

"Do you have any tea? Like, I can't find it anywhere." Marie said, althoug it was a bit muffled because her entire upper torso was inside of one of his cupboards. It was one of her traditions to have a cup of tea before going to bed. It didn't really matter what kind, or even if it tasted horrible; as long as it was warm tea.

"Umm, I'm not sure. I can apparate to the store and pick some up if you want me to." Viktor said uncertainly. Marie couldn't help the crazy, probably psycotic looking, grin that appeared on her face. She had forgotten that he was a wizard. And he could do magic.

"No, I can get some later. I want to see you take out your wand and do magic." Marie said excitedly.

"Wait, what happened to not sleeping with me?" Viktor asked, mistaking her meaning. Marie's eyebrows scrunched in confusion, until she thought back to what she had said. And she could have been refering to a certain part of the male anatomy with her statement.

"Eww, no. I do not want to sleep with you. I have never seen anyone do magic before." Marie could tell that Viktor still didn't get what she was talking about. "Like turn that rock into a flower." Marie said pointing at a rock that was sitting on the windowsill. Viktor's face scrunched in confusion, but he pulled out his wand and transfigured the rock. Marie couldn't help the squeal that escaped her. "That. Was. Amazing. Do it again."

"You act like you have never seen magic in your life." Viktor said, and then transfigured the flower into a duck.

"Well, I haven't. I mean, I didn't even know it existed until Caprice and I stumbled upon the Leaky Cauldron a couple nights ago. And I thought I had imagined it. But maybe I am imagining this. Maybe I am just really drunk, and this is like a hallucination. I'm kinda tired. Where can I sleep?"

-+-

As Marie was waking up the next day, she was semi-aware that she was still in her extremely revealing green shirt from the night before, and she was on a couch. But she didn't remember where. And Caprice was no where to be seen. Which either meant they had gone home with guys, even though one of their rules was not to. Or Caprice was in a bed, while she was on the couch. Marie took a deep breath, got up, and looked for the door. She left the room she was in and entered the next room, which happened to be the dining room. And there was a guy sitting in one of the chairs.

"You going to say something, or just stand there and stare at me?" He asked and then turned around to face her. She vaguely remembered him from the bar the night before, but what little alcohol she had, had messed with her memory- so she didn't remember exactly what happened.

"Umm, hi. I guess." She said, and then he gestured for her to sit down. "I don't really remember what happened last night. So if you would be so kind as to tell me what I did and how I ended up here, that would be much appreciated."

"Oh, well Caprice got extrememly drunk and passed out. And she hadn't bothered to tell you the address of where you were staying for the night, so I offered to let you two stay here. And since she was already out cold, she got the bed and you got the couch."

"Okay. So we didn't, umm, do anything? Right?" Marie asked.

"No, we talked for a bit. And then you went to sleep." He said. "So you said something last night about never seeing magic before. Care to elaborate?"

"Well, Caprice and I are Muggles. And we don't know how, or why, but we stumbled upon this...world. And that would have been the night before last that we found the Leaky Cauldron."

"So, that's why you never heard of me before? You're Muggles. Make's sense."

"Yeah, but the strange thing is that in our world there are books written about this world. So we kind of know what to expect. Except we never thought we would actually find this world."

"Books? About who?"

"Harry Potter. They are all about his school years. You are in the fourth one. It's called the Goblet of Fire."

"The Triwizard Tournament. That's when I meet Hermione."

"And you guys went to the Yule Ball together. And Voldemort came back at the end of it." Marie said. Viktor looked thoughtful after she said this, trying to figured out what made these two Muggles special enough to enter the Wizarding world. Because he had been taught at a young age that Wizarding buildings were invisible to Muggles. "Which room is Caprice in?"

"Go out this door and make a right. It's the second door on the left." He answered absently. Marie followed his instructions and found Caprice, still out cold, laying in bed. Marie walked over to her and reached out to shake her awake, and then realized her bracelet was missing from her wrist. She wracked her brain, and didn't remember ever taking it off the night before. But then again, she didn't really remember doing anything the night before. She shook Caprice to find out if she had done anything to it, but after 30 seconds of Caprice being nonresponsive she decided to just go to the bar from the night before. She quickly set off and went into the bar.

"Hi. I'm not sure you remember me. I was here last night." She said a bit timidly to the bartender. His eyebrows rose in surprise.

"How could I ever forget you? Your face is unforgettable. Not to mention that shirt." Marie blushed as she remembered that she was still in her shirt from the night before. "Now how can I help you?"

"I think I lost my bracelet here last night. It is made out of silver and it has a heart tag on it. It says my name." She said, crossing her fingers behind her back hoping he knew where it was. The bartender reached under the bar and pulled out her bracelet.

"This it?" Marie ran up and grabbed it out of his hand.

"Yes, thank you." She quickly left out of the front door, so she could try to find the house they were supposed to have slept in the night before. And she ran straight into Caprice. "Hey, you finally woke up. Where's Viktor?"

"How should I know? Why would you leave my sleeping, in the DIRT?" Caprice half yelled. She couldn't fully get her voice to work, because of her raging hangover. But she got pretty close to it.

"I didn't, you were in the guest bed at Viktor's house. I had to sleep on the couch, because you were already passed out and that means you got dibs on the bed." Marie said surprised.

"Well that's not where I woke up. I woke up right here, in the fucking dirt." She said, and it was true, there was a faint outline of someone on the ground that hadn't gotten dust on it.

"Well, I left you out the other door. The one that leads to the magical world. Where Viktor's house is." Marie said. "Have you ever wondered what allowed us to get into the world of Harry Potter. I was thinking about it, and I thought of those strange lockets we got for graduation. I think this is what it was talking about. And remember it said it doesn't work without its sister locket. So I left the world, and you were transported. But that means we have them with us. And we would know, I mean we have been looking at each other and the mirrors plenty since then. So I guess it's not-" She was cut off by Caprice's gasp.

"Your locket is around your neck. It just like appeared." Caprice said, and then her hand went to her throat. And she felt the locket that had just materialized on her neck.

"Oh my gosh. I was so totally RIGHT."

**Okay, we finally finished. I hope you guys enjoyed Caprice's drunkeness. If that is even a word, or if I spelled it right. This was 10 whole pages in Word. I think it's the longest I have ever written, even though I didn't write the whole thing. So please go to my page and check out my website. It has pictures of the lockets and our shirts. They are pretty spiffy. And I think if you go there you can figure out who's who. So both of us are going camping this week- although not together- so if you ask me any questions I won't be able to answer until then. But please review, or go to my site. You can become a member and ask me questions there 2.**


	4. Finally Going Rock Snogging

Dark Side Strip Club

By FreeAgain and Mrz. Draco Malfoy

Chapter 3: Finally Going Rock Snogging

_Previously: "Your locket is around your neck. It just like appeared." Caprice said, and then her hand went to her throat. And she felt the locket that had just materialized on her neck._

_"Oh my gosh. I was so totally RIGHT."_

"God damn," Caprice whispered, "lower your voice. And turn down the bloody lights!"

"But don't you see?!" Marie exclaimed, "If I am right, WHICH I TOTALLY AM-"

"Jesus Christ!" Caprice interrupted, rubbing her temples. "You're right," she placated, "now before we do all this freaking speculating, can I have a few? And what exactly happened last night?"

"Remind me never to let you have alcohol again," Marie said, then muttered something that sounded suspiciously like 'bitchy.' Caprice rolled her eyes. "Come on, Viktor can probably help."

_Viktor_, Caprice thought. She was starting to get a vague idea of what had happened last night. At least, enough of a recollection to realize it was faintly reminiscent of the Leaky Cauldron incident. Marie grabbed Caprice's arm and led her into the kitchen where Viktor was still sitting.

"I didn't have sex with you did I?" Caprice panicked.

"Am I that revolting?" Viktor asked, raising his eyebrows in mock hurt.

"That's not what I meant, but seriously, did I?" Caprice demanded, squinting against the already dim lights.

"No," Viktor assured her. "You seem to have a bit of a hangover," he pointed out. "I wonder why that is," he teased. Caprice shot him the bird. "Well, you're just a ray of sunshine, but drink this, it'll help." Caprice immediately grabbed the glass from him and drank some of the contents warily. The effect was instantaneous, the moment the warm liquid passed Caprice's lips, her headache ebbed away and the lights seemed to grow darker.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," Caprice said fervently. "What's in this?" she asked curiously.

"Basic ingredients for a Hangover Potion, for lack of a better term. You know, blood from a cat's face-" Caprice had taken another gulp, which she now spewed across Viktor's kitchen. He laughed loudly. "I was kidding, nothing bad, I promise. I bought it from the store, actually."

"Now, someone tell me exactly what happened last night, and what I did, because I don't remember anything after _you_-" she shot Viktor a glare, "dared me to drink a bottle of fire-whisky!" Viktor laughed loudly when he remembered Caprice's drunken state.

"Well, Caprice," he began, but Marie faked a cough before he could continue.

"Hem, hack, Lord Walmart, hem." Viktor continued, ignoring the interruption.

"You drank the whole bottle," he started, smiling in amazement. "I know a lot of grown men that can't do that, so, for that, I congratulate you. Then you became...intoxicated."

"You asked him if he beat his Bludger," Marie added, snickering. Caprice flushed. "He didn't get it, don't worry." Viktor still looked slightly confused. "I'm rather surprised he hasn't figured out your sexual innuendo, yet." A few seconds later comprehension dawned on the man's face, followed smartly by a slight pink.

"Er...shortly after, Marie tried to get you to stop drinking by taking the bottle, causing you to shout, and I quote, _Back off my whisky, bitch_."

"But before that you asked Viktor if your boobs looked big in your shirt. Viktor seems to be leaving off some of the more embarrassing details!" Automatically, Caprice looked down at her chest, horrified to see she was still wearing her shirt from the night before.

"I look like a whore!" Caprice whined.

"Then," Viktor persisted, "Marie tried some fire-whisky, and ended up choking it back out onto my face, downed some butterbeer, and some random man pounded into the pub, and knocked her drink out of her hands. About a dozen Quidditch players tackled him."

"I wish I remembered all this!" Caprice snapped. "This sounds hilarious, not to mention embarrassing. And I swear," she glared at Marie, "if anyone finds out about me being such a tart, I'll kill you."

"It gets better," Viktor promised.

"Or worse, depending on your view," Marie mumbled.

"So, you pulled aside one of the guys on the Irish team and told him he had nice arms and _pretty eyes_. He tried to get you to go home with him." Caprice's eyes widened.

"Shit," she mumbled.

"You asked if you could get a puppy on the way there," Marie told her. "I told him to go away, basically, and he did."

"So, you drank a lot more, sang like a Smurf, and some other song about riding Quidditch players," Viktor coughed uncomfortably. Caprice buried her face in her hands.

"Is there more?" she mumbled, her voice obscured by her hands.

"You jumped up on the bar stool," Marie stepped in for Viktor. "You proclaimed yourself as the," she stifled a laugh, "Dark Lord Walmart."

"Then you called Garrett, er...Anderson, back..." Viktor trailed off now.

"He tried to ask what you needed, or something like that, but you totally started making out with him," Marie told her.

"So I made out with a hot guy, but I can't remember it?!" Caprice screeched indignantly. "That's so not fair!"

"Well, he's staying in the area, so if you'd really like to make out with him again, I'm sure he'd be more than willing," Viktor said, chortling.

"I may look like one, but I am _not_, in any way, a slut!" Caprice said with dignity.

"You know, Marie's a lot nicer than you," Viktor commented, hoping to get a reaction.

"Well," Caprice said, not at all irritated, "I'm going to take that as a compliment, I choose not to be super freaking friendly. If everyone in the world was a ray of damn sunshine then it wouldn't be very entertaining, now would it? The nice people aren't going to rule the world." Caprice was only half kidding.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Marie said. "We all know you've got a power complex."

"But that's why you love me!" Caprice said, taking on a more sing-song voice.

"Aw, shit!" Caprice suddenly exclaimed.

"What's wrong?" Viktor asked in surprise at her outburst.

"We're missing the Blarney Stone, I've wanted to see that _forever_!" Caprice needed to hit something, and Viktor was right beside her.

"Hey!" he accused. "What'd you do that for?!" he demanded, rubbing his arm where Caprice had nailed it with her fist.

"Oh, did I hurt wittle Viktor Krum?" Caprice taunted. There really wasn't a reason behind the violence, except that she was irritated.

"No, I just didn't expect it," he lied. _Damn_, he thought to himself, _she's a lot stronger than she looks._

"Cap took weight training," Marie explained, correctly interpreting his silence, she'd always been good at reading people. Almost Edward like in her knowledge of supposedly private thoughts. She liked to claim she was just observant.

"Do you not realize we just missed getting to see the Blarney Stone?! All because I had to go and get myself wasted! God damn, son-of-a-bitch," Caprice kept mumbling curses under her breath.

"Well," Viktor said, eyeing Caprice warily afraid of being hit again. He turned his attention to Marie. "I could find another guy or two and we could fly you there..." he trailed off, wondering if it was a good idea.

"Oh, my gawd!" Marie gushed. "Thank you, thank you!" She flew out of her seat and hugged Viktor. Caprice shot her the _are-you-really-hugging-the-Bulgarian_ look, and Marie seemed to realize her actions were a bit odd. "Sorry," she apologized.

"It's alright," he assured her, patting her arm. "I'm gonna go find someone else, I'll be back in a few."

"You could be a bit nicer to him, you know?" Marie reprimanded.

"Oh, fine, I suppose," Caprice relented, not wanting an argument.

"Be nice to whoever he brings back, too, they're taking us to see the Blarney Stone, so be happy!" There was a loud pop. Caprice screamed and fell out of her seat. Viktor helped her up. No sooner had she dusted her pants off, then another loud crack resounded, and she jumped about a foot in the air. Marie laughed a bit, but when she saw the latest addition, she cackled hysterically, clutching her sides. Viktor was restraining laughter. Caprice looked at the guy. He had nice eyes. He looked vaguely familiar. He threw some fabric at her, and she automatically caught it. It was a shirt, from the looks of it, an old jersey.

"Thanks, I guess," she said warily.

"Yeah, well I didn't think you'd want to wear that out, and from what Viktor said you guys just kinda crashed here. No luggage."

"Well, thanks for considering me, as well!" Marie snapped.

"Go to my room and find something," Viktor offered.

"Thanks," she said, leaving.

"That's what friends are for," he told her. He liked the idea of having a "just friend" girl. There were too many that just wanted to sleep with him, and he found it refreshing to not have to ward off any approaches.

"I'm gonna go change, then." Caprice left the kitchen and opened a door, relieved to see a bathroom. She looked at the jersey in her hands, feeling a bit odd about wearing it, but shrugging it off. Only as she began to pull it over her head did she realize it said "Anderson" on the back.

"VIKTOR!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. Marie burst in with Viktor right behind her.

"What?" Marie demanded.

"Do you see the name on the back of this shirt?" she shrieked. "That's the guy I made out with? You brought him here?"

"Well sure, he's Irish, he'll know a bit about the Blarney Stone," Viktor said innocently. Caprice huffed, but plastered a smile on her face. The three squeezed out of the small bathroom.

"I don't think we ever got properly introduced," Anderson said as they reappeared.

"I'm Caprice."

"I'm Marie."

"I'm Garrett Anderson, chaser for the Ireland Quidditch team." He smiled smugly.

"You seem modest," Caprice said, smiling slightly. "Let's go snog the rock!"

"Have you either of you flown before?" Garrett asked.

"No," Marie answered. "You see we're Muggle-ow!"

"Muggle-borns, we're Muggle-borns, so our parent's didn't think it was safe, blah, blah." Caprice shot Marie a look, and Viktor looked at them both quizzically, but chose not to point out the lie they were obviously feeding Garrett. Marie had already told him that that they were Muggles. But that wasn't part of what they had revealed to Caprice, so maybe she didn't know the cat was out of the bag.

"So lets go. Caprice can go with Anderson, since he already claimed her." Marie said laughing.

"You just want to go with Vicky." Caprice said, while making a kissy face at her friend.

"I guess I'm behind then, I haven't made out with him yet. Or almost gone home to sleep with him for that matter." Marie said, causing both Caprice and Garrett to start blushing.

"But you did go home with him didn't you?" Caprice retorted.

"Yeah, but you were in his arms, not me. Jeez, why do you get all of the guys?" Marie said, pretending to pout. "Well, why are we just standing here? Let's get going." The men stepped onto their brooms and Caprice and Marie climbed on the back, like they had seen people do on motorcycles.

-+-

Thirty minutes later they arrived at the castle the Blarney Stone was housed in, and both girls had fallen asleep against the drivers. Neither of the Quidditch players had ever had anything like that happen to them. They exchanged glances, wondering how to wake them up. Anderson decided to just give Caprice a little nudge to wake her up. But it backfired when she jumped backwards and fell off of the broom onto the ground.

"What the hell? What was that for?" Caprice yelled, still a bit out of it from just waking up. Anderson swung off his broom and held out a hand to help her up. She ignored his hand and stood up by herself. Once she dusted off the dirt she noticed that Marie was still asleep, laying against Viktor. "Hey! Wakey, wakey Marie."

"Go away." Marie mumbled, not really awake. Caprice walked over with an evil grin on her face. She poked Marie and her eyes flew open, just in time to see Caprice reach over to push her off of the broom. Instinct caused her to tighten her arms around whatever they had already been around, which just so happened to be Viktor Krum. And coincidentally both of them fell onto the ground under the broom. "OWWWWW! Get off of me."

"You are the one who pulled me off of my broom. Not really my fault that you fell asleep either." Viktor said, untangling Maries arms from around his waist.

"Well you are the one who let her push me off your broom. You could have gently pushed me off, we were 3 feet off the ground still." Marie said. And then remembered how she had ended up on the ground with a guy on top of her. She turned around slowly, and used her most potent glare on Caprice. "You."

"I fell off of my broom too. So I decided that you should share the same wake-up call that I had. I tried to wake you up, and you said go away. So it's your fault." Caprice said.

"Hey, no cat fights, girls. We came here for a reason." Viktor said, trying to avoid any blood shed. Although he didn't know if they would actually draw blood, but he remembered the punch from Caprice earlier. And that thing had hurt.

"Oh yeah. Time to go rock snogging." Caprice said, spinning around so she was facing the castle that they had to climb.

"I don't think you need to, you already have the gift of gab." Marie said, and then grabbed Caprice's hand and pulled her towards the extremely large stone building in front of them.

"Hey wait up." Anderson called from behind them.

"Aren't you supposed to be an athlete? We are wearing 5 inch heels, running through grass." Caprice yelled back to him.

"That is really sad." Marie added. The girls rushed up to the door, and went in. The inside was extremely dark and musty. Marie and Caprice looked around, but couldn't find any stairs to get up to the Blarney Stone. "Maybe you should ask your snogging buddy if he knows how to get upstairs."

"Well I would. IF HE WOULD GET HIS BUTT IN HERE." Caprice yelled the last part out the door, just as Anderson and Krum made it up the hill.

"Took you guys long enough. Now go figure out how to get us upstairs." Marie said. Her and Caprice stood back while the guys searched the entire room, trying to find a door or stairway. "Hurry up. We don't have all day."

"Well if you guys would help us we might get this done faster." Anderson retorted.

"Well you guys have wands that you can use. We don't." Caprice said.

"What happened to your wands?" Anderson asked.

"We...left them in our luggage. And we haven't gone to get it back yet." Caprice said.

"Why would you go somewhere without your wands?" Anderson asked. Marie and Viktor glanced at each other and started to laugh.

"Why are you laughing?" Caprice and Anderson asked at the same time.

"Well, we both know that you are both Muggles. And you're pretending to be witches. And it is hilarious to see you try to fool Garrett into thinking you are witches." Viktor told her.

"And just so you know, we have no magical talent at all. We never even knew this world existed in real life until we stumbled upon it a couple nights ago. NOW GET US UPSTAIRS YOU IDIOTS!!!" Marie said, since no one was searching for the way up. She turned around, and immediately saw a stairwell through a doorway. She sighed, and gestured for Caprice to follow her, while the guys continued looking down the hall for a way up. As silently as they could manage they snuck out of the room, and made it all the way to the top before they heard the guys realize they were missing. They stood at the edge and watched them run outside, and even from the top of the castle they could see the looks of relief on their faces. They had obviously thought the girls had taken their brooms.

"Hey guys. You miss us." Caprice yelled down to them. They looked up surprised, and then turned back towards their brooms. The got on and started to rise in the air. "Hey, don't leave us here."

"You are just going to abandon us in the middle of no where." Marie called to them.

"Nah, we just thought it would have been much easier if we could fly up here," Viktor said as they landed beside Caprice and Marie. "Now, go do you kissing thing."

"Okay, you guys are strong. Hold onto my feet." Caprice said while sitting as close the edge as she could. Viktor and Anderson looked confused. They had never seen anyone kiss the Blarney Stone before, and didn't know how it was done.

"You have to hold her feet so she doesn't fall headfirst through the hole. She is going to bend backward through the hole so she can kiss the stone." Maire said matter-of-factly. "And then i have to do it."

"So get over here or I will hang myself down without any support." Caprice said, and both of the guys were holding onto her feet in a flash. "Much better."

"Now make sure you don't let go of her." Marie said needlessly. Nothing short of a natural disaster could have broken the hold they had on her legs. Caprice leaned backwards into the gap between the rocks until she was completely vertical, with her head down and her feet up. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to the rock in front of her.

"I did it. Now bring me back up minions." She said, and the Quidditch players immediately listened to her and she was on her feet in less than ten seconds. "Wow, I have minions now."

"My turn. And make sure you don't drop me." Marie said as she got into the same position that Caprice had started in. Garrett and Viktor grabbed her feet and she started to lean back. Suddenly out of no where an earthquake hit. And this was one of those natural disasters that broke the strong hold on her legs. She didn't even register that she was falling. She vaguely heard Caprice scream, and turn hysterical- but her attention was focused on a large blob of light that was shooting towards her. Seconds before she hit the ground it was beneath her, and she landed on top of it. Then what had happened sunk into her brain. She was probably dead right now, and this light was carrying her towards heaven. She glanced down at the 'cloud' and realized that it was actually comprised of tiny little bearded men with red vests, each carrying a minute lamp of gold or green. She uttered one word before blacking out "Leprechauns."

**I hope you liked it. This story is supposed to be funny and stuff, and we are going to get to the prologue way later in the story. And I got the description of the leprechauns from the fourth harry potter book, at the quidditch world cup. And this isn't a total Harry Potter story, we just put it there because we would probably get more people from there. So if you have any story, movie, etc that you want us to add- hopefully with some hot guys that we can later add to the strip club- review and tell us. Or me. And I asked Vannah- aka Mrz. Draco Malfoy - what she wanted me to say from her. "Those fucking leprechaun bastards" was her response.**

**So please review and give us feedback, or anything else. And we still have spots open if you want to figure out who is who. Some hints- my website, or some chapters in her story. Remember, if you get it right we will use our creative talents in whatever way you want us to- within reason. :)**


	5. NOTHING TO DO WITH THE PLOTLINE!

**Just a word before you read. THIS HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE STORY. read the authors notes at the bottom to see how this came to be. So keep that in mind and just go with it. And this has mild stripping in it. So be warned.**

"Draco," Sam began, hoping to clarify what she had said earlier. "There are two people in my life who I would die for. You and my grandfather. I'm not very brave, but I'd do anything in the world for the two of you. I hope you know that."

"I know, and to be perfectly honest, you're probably the only person I would risk my life for. Saying all of this makes it so much more real, though. I hate this damned war. I want it to be over."

"Do you ever get the feeling your being watched?" Sam queried.

"Yeah. I've got this feeling that somewhere, there's a ginger watching everything we're saying. It's a creepy feeling, wouldn't you say?"

"Definitely. Maybe, we're, like, on candid camera!"

"Oh, yeah! Then some camera crew's going to come out and say we've been punked!" Draco almost yelled.

"You know what'd be even weirder?"

"What?!"

"If you had a twin brother! That'd be crazy, and, like, your dad locked him up in the basement cuz he was nice to Muggles!" Sam was getting pretty worked up.

"Oh my God! That'd be so epic! Then we could start a strip club!"

"A strip club?" Sam asked skeptically.

"Yes! I'm thinking something along the lines of...Dark Side Strip Club!"

"We could make MILLIONS!" Sam screamed, jumping up and down on the bed. "HERMIONE!" she yelled. Draco shot her an odd look. "Come on," she grabbed his hand and drug him down the stairs.

"What's going on?" Hermione asked.

"WE'RE GOING TO START A STRIP CLUB!" Sam yelled. "Draco's going to be a male stripper! How awesome is this?!"

"Strippers are supposed to be attractive," Hermione pointed out.

"HEY! HE'S DAMN GORGEOUS! But what if he's not a good stripper?" she fretted. "Strip." she commanded.

"Excuse me?" Draco asked, less excited now.

"WE CAN'T MAKE MILLIONS IF YOU CAN'T STRIP IN FRONT OF PEOPLE!" she yelled. "We need music." She looked at Hermione. A deep bass song filled the air.

"I SAID STRIP!" she screamed. Draco began moving to the beat. After about thirty seconds, he took his shirt off. Hermione froze. She witnessed what Sam must have realized long ago. Draco Malfoy is a God. He continued, and pretty soon Sam and Hermione were squirming uncomfortably, much too turned on than was safe. Harry was struck by a strange thought.

_If I was gay, I would jump him_, Hary thought to himself. About two minutes later, the strip tease was over, and, much to Sam's disappointment (Hermione's as well, though she would never admit to it) Draco's boxers were still on.

"Er..." Hermione squeaked out. "I'd say that'd be a fairly decent show."

"You're just jealous that _I've_ seen him WITHOUT the boxers," Sam said slyly.

"Well, I wouldn't say I'm _jealous_, but...he's not half bad looking," Hermione consented.

"Toldya he was gorgeous," Sam taunted.

` "But is he...immortal?" a strange voice sounded from the front door. Sam screamed, and Hermione fell to the floor in shock. "Allow me to introduce myself, ladies," his voice was like melted honey. "And gentlemen." His eyes lingered a little too long on Draco's half, well three-fourths, naked body. "I'm Edward Cullen. Vampire by day, amazing stripper by night."

"Vampire, stripper, homo," Draco taunted.

"Yes, yes I am," Edward consented.

"Are you really?" Ron asked, a bit too interested.

"Yes, now let me demonstrate my mind altering ways," Edward said haughtily. "I'm going to need a pole...you, redhead, be my pole," he commanded. Harry snickered as Ron stuttered, turning a violent shade of maroon to rival the annual Christmas sweater. Edward seemed to vanish and reappear in the next second, only this time, he was carrying a boom box. He pressed a button and a song about milkshakes filled the air. Edward ran a hand over his make-shift pole, aka Ronald. Draco sat down next to Sam on the floor, watching a little apprehensively. Neither Hermione nor Sam could deny that he was, probably, the best looking person ever. He began to slowly unbutton his, no doubt, very expensive shirt. His pale chest was flawlessly smooth and very chiseled. He had less modesty than Draco, that much was obvious, as he ground to the beat in a very seductive manner.(on the pole) His lack of modesty was shown when the song came to an end and he started to remove his last article of clothing.

"Er...that's really not necessary, is it?" Harry asked. He had seen enough of the male anatomy to last him a life-time already. Ron, however, seemed a bit randy, for lack of a better word. He seemed to have pitched a tent. A tent that Edward was eyeing openly.

"Would you like a tour of the house?" Ron suggested, his voice barely more than a squeak. As they nearly ran off, Hermione gave an audible huff of anger.

"He rather gave me the impression he was straight," she sniffed.

"Well," Sam said, all business. "I would say we should add ol' Eddie to the roster of strippers. He'll bring in a pretty big gay crowd. After all, customers are customers."

"Do you have any more openings, madam?" a very deep voice asked from the front door. The men were multiplying like rabbits! Rabbits I say! Not to mention, they were going at it like rabbits. This man had an olive complexion with ebony hair and obsidian eyes to match. He practically oozed sex appeal. Hermione was immediately flustered.

"Well, I would say that would depend on if you were a good stripper or not, wouldn't it?" Sam said.

"Hey, hey," Draco said, getting defensive. "No being all flirty flirty with the employees," he said, giving her a surly look.

"Does that mean I'm not allowed to be all "flirty flirty" with you?" she asked. He stammered a bit, but she just laughed, pecking him on the cheek.

"My name is Murtagh, and I am a brilliant stripper."

"You have a specific song you want?" Hermione asked breathlessly.

"Sex on Fire," he said with a wink in her direction. Hermione waved her wand and yet another song filled the air. He gestured to Hermione, silently asking her to join him in what was sure to be another epic strip. She stood up, blushing all the while. He slowly began pulling his worn t-shirt over his head. When it was finally gone, he grabbed Hermione's hands bringing them to his bare arms, Hermione shivered, but shook her head. There was NO way she could do that without jumping him right there in front of the others. She staggered a few feet away, taking a seat again, but smiling at Murtagh slightly. He didn't look crestfallen, probably realizing he wasn't being scorned. He continued his stripping, very very slowly removing his leather pants.

"Stop drooling," Draco snapped, crossing his arms.

"I'm not drooling," Sam whispered. Murtagh finally stopped after fiddling with the waist band of his underwear teasingly.

"Drool is a deadly sin, you know?" Sam said, more loudly this time.

"So, you know I've got a pretty impressive dragon," Murtagh said to Hermione as he pulled back on his clothing.

"I'll bet you do," Hermione said, unable to control her words. "You wanna, I dunno, see the house?" Hermione suggested with no attempt at subtlety, using Ron's earlier line.

"How about you come with me, and I'll show you Thorn," he suggested instead. "He's not far."

"Alright," Hermione conceded, willing to go ANYWHERE that involved Murtagh. The front door shut behind them.

"How much you wanna bet they do it on the back of his dragon?" Sam challenged.

"Ten sickles, Hermione wouldn't do that," Harry argued. Needless to say, Sam soon gained ten sickles.

"So..." Draco began awkwardly. "Weasley's batting for the other team."

"Well, I figured as much. I share a dorm with him, he moans your name in his sleep quite a lot, actually," Harry said, remarkably blase. Draco shuddered and dry heaved briefly.

"That's disgusting," he managed to choke out. "I feel very unclean just thinking about that," he shuddered again.

"So we officially have three strippers," Sam said, writing down the names.

"We could get Blaise to do it, probably," Draco added. Then, like magic, Blaise was at the front door.

"I'd reckon so," Blaise said with a smirk. Suddenly, Ginny came through the front door.

"Hello Harry!" she said brightly. "Where's Mione?"

"Er...she had to step out for a bit," Harry said evasively.  
"Where's Ron?" she asked.

"Upstairs," Harry answered shortly.

"Going at with a gay vampire," Sam supplied. Ginny nodded, not seeming surprised. Then she looked around for the first real time.

"Two more questions, then," Ginny said. "Why is Malfoy naked and what is _he_ doing here?" she gestured to where Blaise stood.

"Oh, well, we're starting a strip club," Sam said. "Draco, Edward, and Murtagh are all going to be strippers, and Blaise just showed up. Do you want a job, Blaise?" she diverted her attention from Ginny to Blaise.

"Shouldn't we make sure he's a decent stripper?" Ginny asked.

"I can see where this is going," Harry said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, um...Ginny can be the judge of that, let us know if he's up to standard, 'kay, babe?" Sam said, waving them off. Blaise and Ginny looked at each other for a moment, shrugged and headed upstairs, barely making it to the first room.

"That's my room, isn't it?" Harry asked, shaking his head in irritation.

"Yup," Draco confirmed. He opened his mouth to talk again, but the front door burst open. Three teenage girls plowed their way through.

"Come on, Damien!" the taller red-headed girl commanded. She pulled through the door what could have been Draco Malfoy's twin.

"Who the bloody hell are all of you?" Draco demanded.

"I'm Marie." She was the one that had brought the Draco doppleganger in.

"I'm Caprice!" the brunette said with a little too much enthusiasm.

"Clarissa Fray, but I prefer Clary," the tiny red-head introduced herself.

"Damien," the only male introduced.

"Not to be rude," Harry began, "But that didn't really answer the question." Before any of the new-comers could explain another girl walked through the door.

"Riley!" Marie exclaimed.

"Thought you'd forgotten about me," Riley said, acting surly. "You haven't written a chapter in God knows how long!"

"Sorry, sorry!" Marie said, abashed. "I haven't got a whole lot of free time at the moment."

"Oh my God! Draco Malfoy!" Caprice squealed.

"Yes," Draco said warily.

"It's like all of my sick fan-girl fantasies come true. Draco Malfoy sitting naked in the same room I'm in."

"Back off!" Sam said, standing up. "He's my fiancee!" she snapped.

"Only cuz I said so!" Caprice taunted.

"Excuse me?" Sam demanded.

"I CREATED YOU, WE-OTCH!" Caprice screamed.

"EVERYTHING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU HAPPENED BECAUSE I WILLED IT TO BE SO. I'M LIKE GOD IN YOUR WORLD. I OWN YOU! PWN I SAY!" Caprice yelled at her. "And Marie owns Riley! I wrote this story where Draco was in love with a Muggle-born! Her name was Peyton!"

"What happened to her?" Harry asked.

"You know, I haven't decided yet. There are three current options. The first, they're...er...nevermind. No spoilers!" the crazy one decided. "The point is, Draco is rightfully mine! Marie gets Damien, which is the beauty minus the attitude. Their's is a recent development, actually. They make a lovely couple, don't you think?" she babbled on.

"Shut up, Cap!" Marie said, blushing.

"Alright, I've got an idea," Sam said, pulling out her wand. "I won't get in trouble unless you make it so, so just make sure I don't get caught doing magic." She pointed her wand at Draco. "Dopplegangara!" she said sharply, and immediately, another Draco was sitting beside the original.

"SWEET!" Caprice exclaimed. "I get a Draco," she sang.

"I get Damien!" Marie sang, mocking her.

"This is so weird," Sam whispered to Draco.

"I know," he replied quietly. "Where did this even start?"

"You know, I'm not actually sure," Sam admitted.

"And when did this place become some sort of a sex house?" Harry demanded.

"It's a sex house?" Clary asked him. Harry stared at her for a few seconds.

"Yes," he finally decided. Clary smiled brightly and made for the stairs, motioning for Harry to follow her.

"What just happened?" Riley asked.

"I think Harry just ran off with Clary into his room...no wait, his room is taken. I think their in a bathroom. Weird," Draco mused. Quickly, Damien and Marie disappeared to the kitchen, claiming to want some water, but they both wanted water, or something like that.

"Alright, Marie and Damien are having sex in the kitchen now. This is kind of odd, but interesting," Draco 2.0 said.

"Uh-huh," Caprice said, grabbing his hand and pulling him into the dining room.

"WE HAVE TO EAT ON THAT TABLE!" Sam yelled.

"I'm going outside before you two jump each other in front of me," Riley whined. No sooner had the door closed behind her than Draco's boxers were quickly discarded. Riley sat down on the porch (yes i realize there is no porch, this is my made up world, don't ruin it for me) and folded her arms.

"Hey!" she looked up to see a guy with violently blue hair. "Apparently there's some sort of strip club job opening! I need a job! Who should I talk to?" he asked. Riley assessed him.

"Here's the deal," she said. "Everyone's in there going at it like dogs in heat, so I really don't think now would be a good time."

"Why are you not in there?" he asked, confused.

"Ran out of guys, I s'pose," she mumbled.

"I'm a guy," he pointed out. "You can tell them if I'm up to the job, right? I'm bored, you're bored." She shrugged.

"Why not?"

This was officially the strangest night ever.

_Hi lovely readers, MrzDracoMalfoy here! This all started as me TRYING to write a chapter of Accidental Savior on Google Docs. If any of you are aware of how Google Docs works, you know that the collaborators (betas in this case) can watch you type as you type it. So i look up in the corner and see "also editing now:Free Again" So then I just kind of get creeped out and go crazy. I was on cold medication, very tired, and this was the first time in days where I was having any sort of fun writing. So this is NOT an actual chapter, obviously, but merely our way of saying we haven't forgotten this story, nor have I forgotten Accidental Savior, but we're busy. Eventually, we will replace this chapter with the actual chapter, but think of this as advertisement and our goofy gift to our readers. This chapter might warrant an M rating, now that I think about it, but deal with it. I had a lot of fun writing this, it's probably horribly obnoxious to the most of you, but Free Again enjoyed reading it, I think. Speaking of Free Again, here's a note from her:_

**Yeah. So what she said. And Sam is from MrzDracoMalfoy's story Accidental Savior. Which is what the first few lines are from. And Riley is from my story The Other Side. Even though she wasn't as big in it as Sam. And then there was Marie and Caprice. Who you should know by now is us. Now about the story, we have recently started school- like a month ago- and we have barely anytime to ourselves with out doing school stuff. So please don't get mad at us, we really are trying to write- but we have tons of homework and other stories we have to write also. So anyway, if you have something you want to see in this story just leave a review and tell us. And if you want us to write you a story you can still guess who's who. **

_Love,_

**Free Again**_ & MrzDracoMalfoy_


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